Pandemic Pussy: Make Phone Sex Better
Would you like to -get the most from your phone sex?
Do you want to get the most bang for your buck when calling a professional to have top quality dirty talking and fantasy role play with?
If the survivors of this pandemic don’t all end up being active members of weight loss groups and alcoholics anonymous support groups, that may very well be the miracle in all this. In the meantime, here you are, trapped in the house, horny and having watched enough porn already that even your favorite sections of it aren’t giving you the same thrill that they used to.
For those of you who would like a musical accompaniment to offer some humor while reading this, I recommend playing this right now: The thrill is gone by BB King. Classics! Gotta love ’em!
You know what’s missing, but its a pandemic out there!
Oh sweet technology. This is where your genius at saving our sanity comes in. With a phone or a computer, you can have the best virus-free interactive experience known to man. In the old days, it used to be from the other side of a glass while sitting in a darkened, private booth in a place they called a peep show. Now, from the comfort of your own space at home, the only unidentified sticky goo you have to worry about accidentally touching is the remains of the snacking food you didn’t realize you dropped earlier.
For folks who really know the secrets to great escapes, you know that when you want to imagine someone specific, if you are going to watch it, then you have to try and find someone who looks like that person and you can never really lose yourself in the moment because you can never really lay back, close your eyes and enjoy it or you might miss seeing something – and that’s distracting. The best and safest compromise, of course, is a little bit of sweet talking and dirty talking to send shivers and tingles up your spine and electricity into your little brain. With eyes closed, a sexy voice and all those pleasurable feelings you are enjoying in the moment, real sexual bliss and escape from your circumstances are right there and as real and satisfying as if someone were there with you.
Here’s how to make this better so you can get the most out of your dirty talking extravaganza and personal fantasy fiesta!
Do a little research first.
Part of getting the most out of your phone sex adventure begins with thoughtful research. You already know what your favorite scenes are that you like to replay in your head, and you also know what will turn you off. With that in mind, let’s start looking for the right candidate to make it as real as possible.
They say a picture is worth a thousand words but if you have ever used a dating app, you know that a picture can create a very different picture than what you find yourself trying to have a conversation with when you meet. Phone sex can be alot like that. From the actual voice you hear to the personality you are trying to engage with to get some pleasure for yourself, what you see in a thumbnail may be the exact opposite of what you get.
If you want to really get the most from your phone time, ignore the pictures for a moment and, if you can, read the profile and find some free audio samples to base your decisions on, instead. Behind your closed eyes, she can be anyone you want her to be. However, your ears aren’t as versatile when it comes to hearing what you want instead of what is delivered. Dive in a little deeper before plunging in. If you have a specific or special interest, taking a few extra minutes to take a closer look at your options is even more important.
Don’t be afraid, embarrassed or ashamed to ask for what you want.
This is the one time and place where you can really let your crazed monkeys out of their cage and let all Hell break loose in your sexual play pen. Why? Because (1) The only person who knows what you are asking for is you and the person you are talking to (2) In a professional, phone fantasy chat, she doesn’t even know who you are and will never know and (3) Nothing ever goes wrong in a fantasy.
The fact is that whatever you are fantasizing about, there is someone, somewhere who is dreaming about much worse, more bizarre or completely off the rails unacceptable to most people when they are jerking off. If they aren’t, then you are probably one of those people and this means you aren’t alone. No one ever got hurt by a thought in your head as long as it stays there, in your head. There’s always someone who has called a phone sex line and discussed more unusual things than you. Relax and be upfront about what will really turn you on.
When and where you can, be clear about what you like or want.
Sometimes you just don’t know. You’re bored, horny and want to hear a real person talking TO you instead of watching other people have sex and talking to each other (instead of you) on a video and you aren’t sure what will make this the most exciting phone sex you have had in a while.
I will give you an example:
I also do hypno-fetish. I get a very wide array of people with just as wide an array of experiences with hypnotism when they call. Each person has their own expectations of what a hypno-fetish call should sound like and how they should feel during and afterwards. If you have ever been to an old fashioned family owned Greek diner, you will appreciate that this feels the same way sometimes.Someone calls and asks to be transformed into a “bimbo”. When you hear this, it seems really simple. After all, it’s not like they are asking you to transform them into an aeronautical engineer who is a part time rock star and deep sea pearl diver, right?
Simple but not so straightforward. You see, I hear “hypnotize me and put triggers in me that will make me a bubble headed sex doll who lives for shopping and looking pretty” …. I can hear you thinking about women you already know. Stop that and focus for a second. I am telling a story here! LOL…. but what he is wanting is more like “I want to feel like one of these girls. I want her to talk to me like someone would talk to them.”
- What happens next is that I (not understanding what they were really wanted) start asking clarifying questions so I can organize my thoughts and efforts more specifically to what they tell me.
- They answer my questions but become confused by the less than breathy, dirty talking, role playing they were expecting because I am starting a hypno-fetish call not a role play call.
- The sample allotment of time they used for this call ends and they feel like they have wasted their time because they didn’t get what they wanted and now we are both frustrated and disappointed.
- How would he have known the difference? How would I know the difference? Without being a wee bit more clear at the beginning, we are both guessing and hoping instead of getting right to the juicy parts.
How can we make this better and get our happy ending?
For phone sex, follow the basic guidelines above and when still not sure or have a question about what I can or can’t do, you can always ask me by email or chat in advance.
Ready to call and squeeze some relief and happiness into your day?
